How to Give the Best Wedding Toast Ever

Great wedding toasts are heartfelt, memorable and bring tears to guests’ eyes. Make sure your wedding toasts are heralded for sheer brilliance with these key tips:

Wedding Toast Template

The easiest way to give the best wedding toast ever is to get your thoughts in order and establish a nice flow. Here are some key features your toast should include.

1. Identify yourself. Chances are there are a few people in attendance that have no idea who you are. Briefly introduce yourself and explain your relationship to the couple. Consider who might be speaking before you, and if they will reference you, to better plan how your own intro will sound following them.

2. Thank the host. Your first thoughts should be an expression of gratitude to the host of the amazing event, usually one or both sets of parents, or the newlyweds themselves.

3. Congratulate the newlyweds. This is the whole reason you're here, so don't let the obvious go unmentioned.Make sure to applaud the union of the couple and provide a few words and well wishes for their future.

4. Personal stories. Your value as a toast’er is your close relationship with the newlyweds and first-hand experiences with them either solo or as a unit. Share a couple stories or anecdotes with the rest of their family and friends to bring their bond to life. Ideally, add an anecdote about the point in their relationship when they knew they had found their person. If you are closer with one of them, or have had limited interactions with them as a couple, take this opportunity to share some of your favorite characteristics about your BFF for the guests that may not know them so well. 

Try to link these personality traits to their new spouse and how they might complement each other.

Wedding Toast Tips

1. Speak to both halves of the couple. Even if you know one much better than the other, it's important to remember that you are celebrating their relationship together. Not your relationship with your best friend. If you only talk about one entity, you'll be alienating at least half of the guests in attendance who may only know their counterpart.

If you don't know one half of the couple all that well, try to discuss ways that they've made the newlywed that you do know a better person or are a fitting match to their attributes or lifestyle.

2. Keep personal stories in good taste. Keep in mind who your audience is. It is usually comprised of multiple generations of your BFF's close family, friends, and even work colleagues. Don't tell any stories that may come across as inappropriate or that grandma might not want to hear. Similarly, your friend's boss really doesn't need to know any details about how the bachelor party went down.

3. Don't mention exes. Similar to the previous statement, remember who is listening to your toast. Even if you think talking about how bad your buddy's ex was would flatter their new spouse, it's better to refrain from any negative statements altogether. Keep your tone light and positive, and always bring it back to the newlyweds and the present moment.

4. Be yourself. Stay true to your own personality and don't try to put on a show for the crowd. If you're normally the sentimental friend, let your words reflect that side of you instead of trying to come up with an open mic set. Your best friends will definitely be able to tell that you're not being genuine, and even the crowd can usually pick up on something being amiss.

5. Time it. Great toasts are usually around five minutes long—enough time to share a few sweet memories or sentiments, but not so long that guests lose interest. Rehearse your speech several times before the big day to make sure you've got the time down, and also to memorize the key points you want to make. Practice your toast out loud, instead of running through the words in your head. This can make a big difference in timing and allows you to hear any parts that might sound off and need revision.

6. Be mindful of body language. A great speech isn't just a witty compilation of words, it's also about the delivery. Make sure you're standing tall—never, ever remain seated—and exuding confidence, in a location where everyone can see you (otherwise they will tune you out). Don't cross your arms or keep your hands in your pockets, as this comes across as distant, and make sure to keep the mic at mouth level so everyone can hear you. Don't forget eye contact.

Practice delivering your toast in a mirror so you can take note of your gestures and positioning. Make any tweaks you deem necessary to perfect it.

7. Don't forget to smile! This should go without saying, but there are times when those public-speaking jitters get the better of you and that lighthearted speech ends up being delivered with a painful grimace. Remember: You're talking about a couple that you know and love and have probably shared a ton of laughs with. Make sure that your face reflects the love in your heart with a great, big grin. If you feel your nerves getting the better of you, look at your BFF—aka the subject of your toast—while you recite your speech and forget about the crowd.

8. Keep drinks to a minimum. A glass of bubbly before giving a toast can do wonders to take the edge off and loosen you up a bit. But try to stick to one glass, and remember this throughout the day (hello, pre-ceremony shots and getting-ready drinks), too much alcohol can turn your carefully crafted sentiments into a big, slurred mess.

Get Brainstorming!

Here are a few questions to ask yourself to start brainstorming ideas for your speech.

  • Who is speaking immediately before or after you, and how will this affect the content of your speech? (Perhaps you would want to include a reference to their toast.)

  • What is the general tone you want your words to reflect? Joyful? Serious? Funny? Sentimental?

  • Are there any specific themes in the couple's relationship or life you want to highlight? What are some anecdotes that fit those themes and bring them to life?

  • What's a memory of the newlyweds that instantly comes to mind and always makes you smile?

  • When you picture the couple's life together in a few years (or from this moment forward) what do you see?

  • How will you wrap things up and ask everyone to join you in toasting the newlyweds? (Cheers? Please raise a glass...? On that note…)